4/21/2016 0 Comments Life Is ComplicatedLife IS complicated. We can try to make it simple and easier by steeping ourselves in our practices. Or we can work to dumb it down. For most of us, we don’t want to sit in the passenger seat and watch life roll by. We want to participate and that means continuing to grow and change. And that’s hard work. It’s not the easy way. If you are reading this, then you are probably like me, and want to live to the fullest that’s possible, each and every day. And some days, that means dumbing it down because we can only take in so much, we need to process through things, or we need a day to recover from all the crap that happened the day prior. But for the most part, we strive to grow and change, and figure out on continually deeper levels who we are moment by moment. So we can experience life at it’s fullest, share what it is we want to express, and make our mark on the world. Some days this is harder than others – dealing with our demons and these voices that tell us we’re nothing, or remind us of all the times we’ve failed, or that we might fail this time, and this fail will be BIG. We try to talk ourselves out of living large with all those FEARS that stalk our dreams and silent thoughts. And then on other days, we manage to tap into our inner strength, wisdom, and confidence, and we let our lights shine bright and stand fully as we are, speak our thoughts clearly, and turn a blind eye to anyone who doubts us.
On the days when you struggle, or the times when you are losing the fight for your own freedom – those are the times when your practices can help you move forward. Whether it’s a physical or sitting practice, or both, remembering to turn to your practice for support is key. Understanding which practices help you in what moments is also critical. And turning to a teacher, that can help guide you, teach you the practices designed for specific situations, and can understand where you are, and what you are struggling with, can be life changing, and may help propel you further, faster than you can get on your own. Share your voice! I’d love to hear from you in the comments below - what are your favorite practices to keep you moving through life? Or share a time when you let your light shine through the darkness of your fears so you could shine bright!
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I can't tell you how many times I've heard someone say, 'My mind is so busy, I couldn't possibly meditate.' That's the exact reason to meditate! How else would you expect to create a change in the behavior of your mind? I think it was my teacher Sally Kempton who said that meditation is the process for cleansing our minds. We brush our teeth and wash our bodies to clean them and meditation is what does that for our minds. So for those of us with busy minds {um, that's just about all of us}, the practice of meditation is creating a change in our pattern to just let our minds run amuck. The cool thing about the practice is that after a while you will actually start to notice your thoughts. And you will notice that you have the same thoughts over and over and over and over - day after day after day after day. The art of meditation is seeing that. It's gaining that awareness, because awareness is the first key that you need in order to do something different. That awareness opens you to choice. So eventually when you are 'thought' composing that email for the twentieth time that you need to write or having a conversation in your head with your boss about a stressful situation at work instead of just having the conversation - you can choose to stop that in-your-head conversation. I clearly remembering during one of my meditations when I was on a thought train winding myself through the places I've been and meeting up with folks from my past and BAM in stepped my awareness. And there I was with the thoughts AND the awareness of the thoughts. I had a choice to make. I could keep going with the thought train on the journey through my mind OR I could return to my meditation practice. This is where YOU are headed. You will get there, just keep making the choice to take your seat each day. After a while, your awareness will begin to win and your mind will settle down and stop being such a distraction for you. And then a really cool thing will happen, that awareness will begin to pop up for you outside your meditation practice. All of a sudden you will catch yourself having the same thought again, take note of it, and stop the cycle. Meditation will help you begin to win the war even outside your practice. It's a process - it will take time to unwind your mind. Want some assistance getting there? Join us for Motivate To Meditate or sign up for private mediation sessions! Check out these other blogs on meditation: The Secret Benefit Of Meditation Use Meditation To Stop Unwanted Thoughts And Calm Your Mind What I Learned From Teaching Meditation At The Huffington Post Oasis Recently, I have been working my way through some "pattern breaking" as I call it, and it’s not an easy process. One of the hardest steps is the first - identifying the pattern. We all have them, it's just seems easier to keep blaming others for our problems, or ignoring that we've had the same fight with someone 100 times, or even that we don't like to be around certain people/scenarios/etc. These are all good circumstances, when you are ready, to look for and identify a pattern that you are playing out over-and-over again. Other good places to identify patterns is to watch the scenes and conversations unfold with those you live with, the family you grew up with, your work relationships, and even with friends. Most all of our patterns were formed as children so this is why our family has a knack for bringing these out in us. They become difficult to identify, and break, because they are so ingrained in us that we don't even notice they are there. It really takes a lot for us to step back and see things in a different light. Part of this work is being able to look at your shadow side – your "flaws." And this means admitting that you are not perfect. This can be an immense obstacle that can prevent many people from going any further into pattern breaking. Those that believe they can do no wrong may be able to identify the pattern, but then will keep the blame all external, unable to look at their role in the pattern. This is obstacle number 2. So once we've identified our pattern and accepted ownership of it, we must identify the root. Identifying the root will help heal the old would that caused the pattern to appear in the first place and will also help us in the future when we uncover other patterns that are actually just different manifestations of the one we are currently looking at, but lead us back to the same wounded feeling. If we are able to identify that wound, then it will be easier to identify this pattern and similar ones in the future because it will feel familiar within our physical, emotional, and energetic bodies. Many of our patterns come back to not fully loving and accepting ourselves – this is why I wrote The Power of Love blog. Some other common ones are not feeling safe, not feeling as if we belong, and not speaking our voice (or not feeling heard). The "fun" part is that all patterns demonstrate themselves in different ways for each of us. I like to turn this pattern breaking stuff into a game of detective work. It's not like it's spelled out for you – you have to dig deeper to see what's before you so you can identify it. Finding that root is key, but it also takes a lot of courage. And now we encounter the take action step of breaking the pattern. Another difficult step. Again, this is not an easy task. (Who am I kidding? None of these steps are easy!) We have to identify the pattern as it is unfolding. Whoa! This takes a gigantic amount of awareness and courage. As you move through the action step you will identify the pattern at various stages. It may be a day/week later, it may be just after the incident played out, it may be in the middle of it, or it may be as you begin to step into the pattern itself. This piece of the puzzle will take an indeterminate amount of time to solve. Not the answer we want to hear, but it's the truth. Our self awareness will play a big part in this, and so will our courage and willingness to be vulnerable. It takes a big person to stand in the midst of a pattern and own it. (This is a good place to mention that meditation helps us grow our self awareness. See Times of Transition for additional tips.) The action step involves using the first 3 steps to help break the pattern. When you really take ownership of the pattern that you've identified, then you will begin to see it playing out before you a lot easier. When you fully know the root and can feel it within your body, you will be able to tune in and identify that feeling and know that you are stepping into your pattern. This will be key to helping you identify and break it. You also have to remember that, no matter the point where you realize that you've hit the pattern, that is progress! Even though you may feel frustrated that you are bound to the pattern, be sure to celebrate! That awareness in identifying it, no matter the point in time in which you did, is success! Remember to love yourself as you are going through this process. Hey, that might even be the root of your pattern, so you get another opportunity to try it out. :) Once you realize that you are playing out the pattern, you can change your programmed emotional response to a response of your true nature. This, is beautiful. The process is not easy, but whoever said life would be easy? However, it doesn't have to be hard, either. But we make it hard. It's our own forgetfulness of who we are, and it's this inability to see our true nature and the true nature of everything around us that makes our journeys so tough. It's our own patterns that lay over and cover us, embedded into our egos, that prevent this. And it's busting through these patterns that allow us to see our true selves again. Got any thoughts on this pattern breaking business? Please share them below. Looking for guidance with identifying and working through patterns? I'd love to help. Set up a session to work with me. If you liked this blog, check out Finding Your Way Back Home. |
AuthorJenn White, Yoga Educator, Meditation Teacher, and Owner of Embodied Bliss, began her journey of yoga and meditation in 2004 while recovering from a back injury. Feeling lost, restless and seeking something more from life, she found her path through meditation. Archives
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